Friday, June 7, 2013


1. We are moving.  I think I may have mentioned this, or at least mentioned the news that our landlord announced that she might sell the house, and the new owner might not want to rent it out, so we might be homeless some time after our lease ends in August.  Or, you know, not.  So we collectively freaked out, yelled a lot, and found a new house.  The finding a house angst turned into plans on new house angst, along with OMGMOVING angst, and some of that has lessened, and some if it hasn't, and most of it I'm filing in my head under NOT NOW.

So there is painting to do (which is sounding simultaneously 'totally doable' and 'terrifyingly daunting') and then everything else.  We have keys already, and officially take possession on July 1.  Right now all I can think about is painting.

Learning Sketchup by way of room planning

2. There are new People of Interest on OK Cupid.  Or, at least, I am having conversations with three people, none of whom have actually announced their intentions vis à vis making out.  Honestly, I don't know what my intentions are vis à vis making out, either.  But they are all entertaining, and the attention is flattering, even if it isn't that kind of attention.

3.  I went to the UI Wellness center, where I was very pleased with the service.  I was going to the gym and wanted some kind of orientation or introduction or something, and I saw a "Wellness" office with someone at a desk who looked like she might know the answer to questions.  Turns out that the Wellness center isn't actually part of the gym, it's just in the same building.  They offer "wellness coaching," as part of my benefits package, and I thought that a wellness coach might be someone I could talk to about my inability to understand the signals my body is sending me, and whether this just needed more waiting or I should see sports medicine or what.

And I was a little apprehensive, because I am a fat person talking to people whose job it is to encourage "fitness," which people usually define as, "not fat."  But no one ever mentioned to me that I might want to lose weight.  It was listed as a potential thing they help with, along with quitting smoking, stress management, exercise programs, nutrition, etc.  But they listed it, I didn't bite, and it never came up again.  When I told them that I'm active and feel healthy, they believed me.  I was prepared for FAIL but it never happened.  And I am grateful for that.

My coach sent me to sports medicine.  Sports medicine told me that it isn't a shin splint.  It's likely a stress fracture, or possibly compartment syndrome.  Don't google "compartment syndrome."  There are slight signs on my x-rays that suggest fracture, which is treated much the same way as shin splints, but for a much longer time.  Which sounds exactly like what I've been experiencing.

The advice I've been given is to get a compression sleeve for my leg, which will help support my shin, and slowly start to add back activity.  The doctor says that the mild awareness and discomfort I'd been feeling is acceptable, but I should avoid anything more severe.  It's still hard for me to make those distinctions, but at least I know that's what I'm looking for.  Before, I didn't even know if any sensation was sign of damage or a sign of healing.  I will be back in a few weeks to re-evaluate.  Problems like this are hard to diagnose when they're dormant, so if my leg gets bad again because of the dancing, then they'll be able to better treat it, and if it isn't a problem, then it doesn't matter.

I also asked about my feet, and was given foot strengthening exercises and a new set of orthotics.  If I like them, I can also take them my new tennis shoes and they can take out the inserts that are in the shoe, and replace them with doctor ones.

I am very apprehensive about returning to activity.  I have been shutting my body out so completely this last month, because I couldn't handle having one.  So now I feel bloated and out of shape and I've been gone so long that going back feels like a big deal and I don't want it to be a big deal.  I don't even know when the dancing is anymore.  And I feel like my stress level is high enough with the moving that I have enough energy to do moving things, and play video games, and that's about it.  (Also, my deal with the gym gets me a really good price but I have to go at least four times a month, which would be awesome but right now just feels like One More Thing.

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