Goddamn jealous

There's this scene in Buffy, where Spike has a dream about Buffy and he blurts out I love you.  And he wakes up in shock and thinks Oh shit.

I'd known for a while that the guy I'd been wanting to set a friend up with was someone I was attracted to.  And then I learned more about him and realized that they'd be a terrible match because he's a lot crazier than I'd thought.  Except it's the kind of crazy that makes sense to me.  And then I had the dream, which in itself doesn't mean anything, but when I woke up, it stayed with me.  And there's nothing to be done, because he's off limits to me.  Completely and totally.

Which just means that I feel awkward around him, and every so often, like now, when he posts on Facebook about getting hit on, and he might have taken her up on it, and I am so goddamn jealous.