Reluctant.

It's funny.  I think I've been getting better, but I've been reluctant to say so.  I like the freedom of saying no I can't, and the excuse to shed all responsibilities, to myself, to others, to feed my id and shut out my super-ego.  So if I admit that I did, actually, weigh myself this morning (189 pounds), and that I am no longer convinced that the President's Club Event on Saturday will be a complete fiasco, and that I'm pretty sure that I can hold everything together for another three days, then I have to admit that I am capable of calling people back, and engaging in disagreements without exploding, and sticking to my diet, and everything else I've put on hold.  And that's scary.  I don't want to be capable yet.

So I'm changing the subject.

The Graphic Design workshop put together a journal of graduating MFAs.  It's an amazing body of work, and I'm proud and awed to have worked with these people, for the short time that we were together.  One of the questions asked in the interview section is "What advice would you give to incoming/prospective students?"

This is my answer:

You will make false starts.  You will make mistakes.  Some of your ideas will be brilliant, and some of them will be terrible, and you won't always know which is which until you try them out.  The great thing about group shows is that you don't need a finished, fully-realized body of work to start submitting.  Start early.  Your work will change in ways you would never have believed.  Trust your instincts, even when they don't make any sense.  Don't let your ideas of who you think you are get in the way of what you want to do.  Eat a George's cheeseburger.

And that is enough cliché for today.