Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Week 4, part 2: Shivering Isles
As of this morning, 209 pounds. I didn't go to pub knit last night, partly because I just bought Oblivion for the Xbox and wanted to get to the Shivering Isles, and partly because I'd just gotten home from talking to the night classes in ABW and felt like it had already been a long day, but also partly because I thought I might make good choices about food if I went, but I knew I would make good choices about food if I stayed. And I've been trying really hard to not think about this in terms of shame. The world is full of shame enough for a million fat girls; I don't need to add any of my own. But one more day of weight gain would feel like one more day of failure, and I couldn't stand the thought of it.